Wondering how to love the unloving?
This quote from Thomas Merton captures perfectly the appropriate attitude we need:
“To be perfect then is not so much a matter of seeking God with ardor and generosity as of being found, loved, and possessed by God, in such a way that his action in us makes us completely generous and helps us to transcend our limitations and react against our own weakness. We become saints not by violently overcoming our own weakness, but by letting the Lord give us the strength and purity of his Spirit in exchange for our weakness and misery” (quoted in, Diane LeClerc, “Discovering Christian Holiness: The Heart of Wesleyan-Holiness Theology,” Beacon Hill Press, 2010).
Paul explains this spiritual principle in Galatians 2:20: “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me; and the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me (RSV).
Or as the Apostle John puts it, “We love, because he [God] first loved us” (1 Jn. 4:19 RSV).